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How to deal with difficult people

You can choose your friends but you can’t choose your colleagues. These days many people tends to be difficult because the world has become a battle ground of wits and ego. We all practice the art of disagreement.

A difficult person is one who loves to comes up with ways to disagree. A difficult person’s watchword is ‘no’. While the watch phrase is ‘why do I do this when I can do that?

Sometimes we may find it hard to put up with difficult people because we do not understand them. The question here is what do you do about the difficult people in your organization?

Think of the conflict as a part of life! That way you will be more positive and rational in handling it. Whenever a difficult person manages to get you tangled in a confrontation, accept the person. People tend to be more receptive when they are allowed to express themselves.

Firstly to understand difficult people, we must want to. Here are 4 simple tips to begin with:

  1. Be compassionate. By appreciating their perspective, you can begin to decipher what makes that person tick or blow.

  2. Be rational, rather than emotionally charged. When we practice becoming the observer of our feelings, our thoughts and the situation, we separate ourselves away from the emotions. Instead of identifying with the emotions and letting them consume us, we observe them with clarity and detachment. When you find yourself identifying with emotions and thoughts, bring your focus on your breathe and relax.

  3. Be critical. Try to simply imagine yourself being that difficult and then respond to the person in the way that is most pleasing to you. As cliché as this may sound, we tend to forget that we become blind-sided in the situation. Try putting yourself in their position and consider how you may have hurt their feelings. This understanding will give you a new perspective on becoming rational again, and may help you develop compassion for the other person.

  4. Be considerate. Always deal with others with consideration to common protocol and emotions. Vocabulary is a power that controls the mind. Use the words that are considerate, yet simple, firm and kind. People tend to become difficult when we are given an angle.

Difficult people can be found everywhere, so we are affected by them one way or another. No man is an island – we need people for exchange. We must all cultivate the habit of dealing with such people so as to get things done faster and better. You must train yourself to handle whatever conflict or confrontation they present you with.

“Holding a grudge against someone is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.”

Many times when a person initiates a negative message or difficult attitude, they are trying to trigger a response from you. When we react, we are actually giving them what they want. The only person we hurt is ourselves. When we react to negativity, we are disturbing our inner space and mentally creating pain within ourselves.

Learn how to deal with difficult people, experience the ‘Dealing with Difficult People’ workshop. You and your organization will benefit from a harmonious and effective workforce totally focused on the goals and results.

Check it out now at for more information or email us at

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